I’m a relationship type of person (well I believed that I was), and the thought of having a soulmate that is your best friend is quite exciting for me. Throughout high school there were quite a few flings, but nothing serious to claim it as an “official relationship”. After high school was probably when I started to have serious relationships, and I guess I never been single for a long time or appreciated being single. My relationships were always back to back or I would dread being single because I felt alone.
A few months ago, I was in a terrible headspace and I let the people who surrounded me influence my mind or make me think that there was something wrong with me. The people that I’ve grown up with are either in long-term relationships, stable jobs, bought their new house, getting married or having kids (mind you, I’m only 23). And those were the sort of things that ruined my thoughts – I cried to my mum telling her how I wanted to be married and have kids by now, but in actual facts, I’m not ready and life has a way to show you your purpose in life.
I am starting to appreciate the single life.
This is the time to owe it to me and celebrate my existence. My previous relationships traumatised me to the point where I am extremely exhausted and cannot give myself to anyone else at the moment.
How did I talk myself out of the situation and fears that were surrounding me?
- I accepted the fate, “if it’s meant to be, it’ll be” and right now, it is not the time to “be:
- I started to rely on myself instead of relying on someone else – particularly a man. Why wait for a man to appreciate you when you can appreciate yourself?
- I’ve started to enjoy being free – I have more time for the things I want to do, without anyone bugging me and now I have more funds to spend on myself, instead of spending on someone who doesn’t appreciate it. I also can wear whatever and say whatever, without offending another person.
- And to think that I have to settle at 23 with marriage and kids is a scary thought, especially when I have many passions in life – I’m not ready to be a wife or a mother.
All of the above had moulded me into appreciating the single life. Am I dating? No. Am I talking to anyone? No.
At this point in time, I have no patience and I don’t want to give my time or myself to anyone, except me.
It’s time to do me, and it’s time to do things I want to do.
So, to all my single people – do you boo, do you!