It’s the perfect time to look back on the previous year and discuss what it has taught me. I wanted to talk about lessons that would be useful and relevant to you as well, and not just myself.
1. Love is blind, but don’t ignore all the signs.
Everyone has their own values and beliefs, but sometimes when we’re in a relationship we seem to make sacrifices and allow things to happen because we believe that’s what “love” is. We all have different definitions when it comes to love because what we lack from our family and friends, may be given by the other person and we seem to just settle for it.
Stick to your values and beliefs and do not tolerate a behaviour because you think that’s what “love” is.
2. Do things for yourself and not because of another person.
Whether it’s a relationship, your family or friends, do not allow them to dictate what YOU want to do. When you’re at a young age it’s important to live for yourself and not for anyone else, and I know it’s hard because you want to be able to balance your life.
Making somebody else happy because you’re scared they’re going to leave is the worse thing you can do to yourself. Put yourself first.
3. Learn to say no.
I’m a very nice person… well when you get to know me. I have the tendency to feel sorry for people, and sometimes they just take that for granted.
It’s okay to say no. Again, this goes back to my first lesson learned with “love is blind, don’t ignore all the signs” – your values and beliefs are important. Again, put yourself first and do not say yes to things you don’t want to tolerate.
4. It’s okay to cut people out of your life.
Again being nice is not that great these days because people always take that for granted. I had a few people in my life that I still kept because I was scared to let them go and because I had so many memories of them as well as knowing them for a long time. But, that doesn’t mean anything.
It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known the person or how much memories you have shared with them, if they don’t treat you nor are they patient with you, they are not meant to be in your life.
5. Never give up and keep going.
Don’t get this statement wrong, I don’t mean never give up on an unhealthy relationship – that needs to be given up (lol). But I meant your goals or things you need to achieve. For instance, I never gave up looking for a job because that is what I needed! Although it did take a toll on me and I felt so unmotivated as well as feeling I was not good enough for the job role, it really did make me question my capabilities.
If one way doesn’t work, try another way. Don’t let rejection fear you, keep trying.
6. Allow yourself to heal.
Being heartbroken over someone is normal and it’ll happen, but allow yourself to heal. Don’t let the people around you think that you have to be where they’re at.
You don’t have to be where your surroundings are at, and that’s okay. Allow yourself to heal, but don’t get sucked into what society expects from you, it’s what you expect from yourself.
7. Don’t build extreme protective walls so the other person cannot get in.
It’s normal for everyone to build up protective walls once they’ve been hurt. But when you build up a protective wall, sometimes you miss out on great opportunities and people that would be an asset to your life.
Building walls because you’re scared of the outcome will make you lose great opportunities and people. Obviously, I had my walls up, but at the same time I know I can handle anything that life throws at me, so I let certain people into my life and took a chance.
8. Don’t share your success or plans with someone until it is 100% confirmed.
Sometimes when something good happens to us or we have plans we get so excited and we want to tell everyone! But unfortunately, there are people in our lives or outside of our lives that don’t want to see us be successful, sad huh? Some of our close friends and family members may feel jealous and their negative vibe can rub onto your happiness and success.
Don’t talk about my achievements unless it’s 100% confirmed nor talk about my plans because it’ll never end up happening.
9. Don’t settle for less.
This also goes back to the first lesson learned above, stick to your values and beliefs. Just because they fill in your missing puzzle and do “small” things for you doesn’t mean you have to settle for them. Align the person with your values and beliefs, but make your expectations realistic.
I deserve more and it’s okay to let go of someone that you don’t see a clear future with.
What are some of the lessons you’ve learned in 2017? x